Relationships are as individual as people are. However, most of us find that making a relationship work requires effort. The initial effort required may be simply to commit to the relationship itself. It should be noted that getting your ex back is a process, a strategy! It is not one simple tactic or two. In this article How To Get Your Ex Back –
You’ll learn some important strategy that can give your ex a completely different view of the person you are and get her to fall in love with you all over again.
But first let’s know some basic things, so that You Won’t end up as a needy, greedy and desperate guy, or simply a beta.
Most guys handle a breakup completely wrong, so you should not be discouraged if you didn’t handle the breakup in the way you’re about to learn. On the other hand, it is important to know how to handle a breakup for future reference.
BE OKAY WITH IT
This may sound strange to you but if you’re girlfriend gives you any Bull Sh*t reason to call it off with you, be OK with it. I know it’s easier said than done, but whining, pleading, and worst of all begging is NOT going to change her mind. Her decision to break it off has been nagging her for some time.
Do NOT ever think that the break up was some spur of the moment thing. Women do not work that way…And chances are she’s been pondering the idea long before splitting the sheets with you. The best way to handle your girlfriend breaking up with you is to be OK with it. Don’t fight, don’t plead, don’t beg! Just shrug and tell her, “OK.”
However, what if you didn’t handle it well and you already pleaded and begged for her to stay. No worries, my friend. Many break up ends nasty with fights and name calling on both sides. Why do you think it happens? You got it! Because Guys makes the mistake of trying to change her mind. so don’t lose hope. Just make sure you stop immediately and learn the worst mistakes to avoid so you can get her back faster.
I’m not going in detail here but you can learn how to handle being rejected or simply the break up. In previous article.
Learning these mistakes and the psychology behind them will increase your ability to get your ex back. Ignoring these mistakes can extremely delay or, even worse, ruin your chance in getting her back forever. Once again, this is not a warning, but the cold, hard truth.
1). Don’t Waste Time With the No Contact Rule
You can get her to meet up with you “one last time” (don’t worry, it won’t be the last!) and then re-attract her at the meet up. So, do not waste any more time with the No Contact Rule. Sure, not contacting does get some women to call, but a call from her does not mean that you’re getting her back.
When she doesn’t hear from her ex, a woman will usually call to check that he is still desperately hoping to be with her, which then allows her to continue moving on with the break up more easily. Why? Women aren’t attracted to neediness and desperation in men. She will use the guy’s desperation and pain to feel even more turned off by him and more able to move on.
If you wait too long to contact her, you run the risk of her having sex with another guy or falling in love with the new man she is already with, rather than wasting time with the amateur “No Contact Rule”.
2). Don’t Text Her Unless You Want to Arrange a Meet Up.
According to countless studies by psychologists and social scientists, anywhere from 70-90% of communication between two humans is comprised of body language and tonality. So, when you send a text to your ex, she has to GUESS at what tonality you’d be using, what your body language would be like and how you’d be feeling at the time if you were saying that to her in person.
If your ex currently hates you or perceives you to be needy and desperate, how do you think she’ll judge your text? Will she guess that you are being confident, charming and cool or will she guess that there’s a needy, hurting guy behind that text?
In most cases, your ex will look at the text in a negative way and assume that you’re in a bad place emotionally without her, which will then make her feel more repelled by you rather than attracted to you.
3). Don’t See Any Other Guys as Competition
Women are not attracted to insecure jealousy, so no matter how much she tries to make you jealous or how insecure you feel (e.g. because she’s already with another guy or interested in another guy), you cannot show that at all. Women are attracted to confidence and turned off by insecurity. You have to know that you are better than any other guy she could meet.
Your ex then has to see that or hear it in your voice when you talk to her. She has to get the sense that other guys do not make you feel insecure. They are nothing compared to you. If you don’t have that type of confidence in yourself.
4). Panic Mode
Okay, the feeling of rejection more than just stings. It stings, burns, and consumes. It drives one into panic mode and makes one do all sorts of crazy things. It’s a fact that we do not to like the fear of loss as humans. Actually, we dread it.
We dread it so much we will try to do anything to keep it from happening.So take a few deep breathes and try to relax. The next mistake will show you the effects of what panic mode does to you.
5). Guilty As Charged
Another great mistake we make during panic mode is trying to make our ex girlfriend feel guilty. This act is caused by a combination of rejection and desperation.
Some forms of laying on the guilt are as follows:
You told me you would always love me. Now, I know you’re a liar!
I knew you would hurt me like everyone else has.
All I did was give to you, and all you did was take from me.
You’re a user!
If you really loved me, why are you doing this to me?
Don’t use guilt trips. Doing this won’t make your ex girlfriend change her mind about the break up. It will actually make her realize that her decision to call it off with you was the correct one.
Making this mistake will only make it worse for yourself and harder to correct when the time comes to reconnect with her again. It won’t make it impossible to get your girlfriend back, but we do want to make it as less of a hassle as possible.
6). Just Friends
If you’ve made this mistake and agreed to her suggestion of “Let’s just be friends,” then you need to reverse this as soon as possible.
If you don’t want to get back together continue to be her friend.
However, I’m going to assume that you want her back as your lover. Not a friend. Still having feelings for your ex girlfriend and remaining her friend is a death sentence.
I know, you’re probably thinking it’s wise to stay close to her so you can somehow worm your way back into being intimate with her.
Remaining her friend will only cushion her fall. Not yours!
You’ll make it easy for her to transition out of your relationship, but she won’t do the same. It will be a one-sided agreement in which you will lose.
Then, when you grow frustrated, guess what happens?
That’s right – You’ll start fights and arguments with her. Except this time you’ll only have yourself to blame. You were dishonest about being friends when you wanted more from her.
Don’t apologize for yourself or say things like, “I’m sorry I was so horrible to you,” or “I’m sorry I’m not good enough.”
You are not the problem – it’s likely something you did is the problem.
Don’t be a bitch and yes mam. If someone wants to leave you, let them go.
To get an ex back, you can’t say to her that you WILL change. You actually have to make the changes and then let her see that either in person, via your online presence
on social media sites (Facebook, Instagram, etc) or apps (Whatsapp).
It doesn’t matter if she’s blocked you from Facebook or if either or you don’t use social media; simply get in contact with her either via e-mail or text message using the examples I provide. If she isn’t responding to you now, it’s because you are sending the wrong type of messages to her.
You’ve got to send her a message that makes her feel understood and gives her the impression that you’ve already changed the things about yourself that she broke up with you for.
A woman who lacks experience with relationships or who can’t find herself another guy, will sometimes miss her ex and give him another chance even though he hasn’t changed anything about himself. Yet, she will then dump him once again when she realizes her mistake.
On the other hand, a woman who has a lot of experience with relationships or who has other guys interested (or already hooking up with her), will rarely, if ever, give an ex another real chance unless he changes things about himself that caused her to break up with him.
When a woman breaks up with a guy, she will rarely tell him the real reasons she is doing it. Why? For most of human history (and even to this day), women have been hurt and even killed for breaking up with a guy. So sad of us!
Women have a natural instinct to let a guy down as softly as possible and give him a feeling of hope that if he just keeps his distance, she may change her mind. For example, she might say, “I need space for a while” or “Maybe we will get back together again in future” or “Give me a chance to think about it. Don’t contact me for a month. We’ll talk again then.”
In the meantime, she will quickly try to find another man who can protect her or she will at least try to kiss or have sex with another guy to get you out of her mind.
To get an ex back, you need to discover the real reasons why she has broken up with you and then make the correct changes to your behavior, conversation style and how you treat her. If you are interested to learn exactly how to make those changes right now.
When you know the real reasons why your ex broke up with you, you can make the correct changes that will then make her feel understood and happy to be interacting with you again.
On the other hand, if you don’t know exactly what she really wants to change, you will most likely be offering the wrong things to her during conversation. For example: A woman might want her ex to be more of a man around her, but he is saying, “I promise that I will treat you better. I will do anything” which isn’t what she actually wants from him.
Speak the Same Language, in order to get your ex back.
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