You stop giving a fuck when you have got your priorities right and you know them fully. You know what’s important to you and what’s not. And you care about only those things that are your priorities. You do not care about other’s opinion, nor do you care about how other’s think about you if they’re not your priority or you do not care about them.
When you only focus on the people that you love, the things that you absolutely love to do, the things that gives you goosebumps, generates a sense of excitement in you, when you know these things and these people then you will automatically stop caring about anybody else and their opinions.
It starts with knowing your boundaries or standards. A man who doesn’t stand for anything will fall for everything. And your boundaries and standards come from knowing your values and living up to them. You must know what’s right and wrong, then only can you stand up for it, right? And what’s wrong or doesn’t vibe with your values why would you do them? Or even care about them?
first of all I want you to take out a pen and paper and write 20 of your most important values, these are the values which you will live by your whole life, no matter what.
Once you have written them down, you start putting people and things into those values as to who have those similar values and which things you’ll do that will align well with your values. Once you know these people and things fully, who align with your value, then you have set your standards, your boundaries.
And then you have immuned yourself from the useless, the stupid stuffs, the stuffs that don’t allign with your value and the stuff that is only going to do you more harm than benefit you. Your boundaries will become so strong after this that no person or thing will be able to breach it and harm you or make you feel sad about anything.
So, let’s read on further on how you can make your boundaries, your standards so strong that it becomes unbreachable and unbreakable and you become a strong masculine man who is centered and lives fully with passion and intensity, and doesn’t give a fuck.
>> It doesn’t matter what they think
Nobody is perfect, everybody has some flaws. So, what does it matter what an imperfect person thinks about you until and unless he/she is perfect themselves.
You’re always going to be told that what somebody else has is better, it’s more superior, it’s something that everybody should strive for. But is that what you truly want?
Imagine yourself having all that, and now think is it truly going to make you happy? Does it vibe well with the person that you want to become? [ you can take help of my visualisation article for this ]
I want you to do this because i don’t want you to chase a mirage, that somebody is living a perfect life, and i want it too. Nobody is living a perfect life, nobody is flawless, and that’s what makes them and this world beautiful.
So, if they are flawless yet beautiful why not you? Your imperfection is your beauty. So, let’s flaunt it. It makes you free, comfortable and focused. Once you understand this then your fucks will be more prioritized into the direction that you want them to be.
Notice the fact, that i want you to give fucks, but only to those people and things which matter to you. The people you love, the things you care about, i want you to focus on them. Because that’s what makes you happy, that’s what makes you fulfilled.
Often times you’re going to be told, be like him or her? For ex – In your childhood, you might have been told to be like the A student in your class. Or be like the athlete in your school.
Again , what i want you to do here, is imagine. But this time, imagine your greatest self. Do it with the utmost perfection and details. Imagine how happy he is and how fulfilling his life is. Now, think right now, will you be happy if you did what you’re told you should do? Will it bring you closer to becoming your best version?
For ex – If you were told to become the best athlete in school, but when you imagine your perfect version, he’s a great singer, or an amazing MasterChef or any such thing that doesn’t look like what you’re being told to do. So, why do it at all?
Focus on your priorities, focus on what matters to you. On those stuffs which will propel you into becoming the person that you want to become.
>> Their perception of you will keep changing
This is one of the best things that i have learned overtime. And this happened to me in real life, so i’m writing this from my personal life experience. I had amazing friends, who loved me and supported me. But after sometime, their perception of me started changing and they didn’t felt the same way for me, like they used to. So, I was fine. It happens. Time changes everything.
I was fine because i have a very important self-belief that you can only control yourself, your behaviors and your attitude, not other’s. So, why give a fuck about how others treat you.
Instead of that, i suggest you give a fuck about how you treat others and how you perceive yourself.
For ex – Instead of feeling sad that others don’t like you , you focus on do you like yourself? Do you like others? You focus on your emotions, you focus on yourself. And i promise you, once you keep checking yourself and keep improving yourself, then overtime you will meet like minded people, who would love you and respect you and they will propel you towards a fulfilling and meaningful life.
And the once that left you, or thought wrong or negative of you will come and say, Oh, i’m so sorry. I thought so wrong of you. I knew that you were an amazing person, but i just had some misunderstandings. And you know the best part then, you won’t give a fuck about this person because your priorities lie elsewhere. Your focus is on bigger and better stuff.
>> Be self – aware
Whenever you feel like you have started to care about other’s perception of you, i want you to stop there. Remind yourself what’s important? Their perception of you or your perception of yourself? Focus on your priorities.
Everyday i want you to carve an edge into your own individuality, your own uniqueness. That is everyday you should focus on becoming more unique while also becoming the truest version of yourself. Trust me, there’s no greater feeling than knowing who you are and aligning your whole life, centered around that YOU.
” He who knows others is intelligent; who understands himself is enlightened; who is able to conquer others has force, but he who is able to control himself is mighty. The one who appreciates contentment is wealthy. Dares to act has nerve; if he can maintain his position he will endure, but he, who when dying does not perish, is immortal.”
I want you to first of all understand yourself, understand what makes you happy, what makes you excited and then align your values, your friends and everything else centered around those things. While other meek and coward souls will be trying to fit in with the herd, you will stand out and you will make those sheeps fit in with you.
You’ll become immune to the outside chatter and the useless stuff as you’ll be so busy in your own life, the life created by you, that you’ll stop giving a fuck automatically about those idiotic stuffs.
By the way here are some books which has improved me when I was in great depression in high school. And I would love to if you take your time and read them, trust me it will ten fold your personal development. I really loved the book on stop giving fuck by Mark Manson. You can find all the books which I loved by clicking here.
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>> Be Free
Have NO filters or protocols around you.[ but don’t break laws or become a sadist ] When you’re absolutely free and you don’t give a fuck about people judging you about ridiculous stuff, you are not bound by dogmas or status quos, then you’re a carefree spirit which is naturally attractive and vibes well with everyone as people want to be free themselves. You’ll become an example for others.
The only that hold you back is you. So, it’s time to free yourself and become the person that has broken the shackles which hold him back and is now walking on his path chosen by him with conscious well-thought and well-planned strategies.
Once you start taking charge and start bringing the changes in your life, you start replacing the bad from the good, the boring from the interesting, the stuffs that you don’t like from the stuff that you love, then you’ll become magnetic, and an energy will radiate from you which will make people mesmerised by you.
Then what will happen is instead of you fitting in, others will fit in your world and the best part is all this will be automatic. I mean, they will do this subconsciously, as they will love you, adore you and respect you that much.
If you want to give a fuck, give a fuck about yourself, your life and how you improve in your life, and how you treat others in your path. That’s a fuck worth giving.
For ex – Every article i write i want to make it my best. That’s what i give a fuck about. I want everyone to get the very best of me all the time. That’s what i give a fuck about.
Now, you think, what’s your priority and where do you want to invest your fucks in? What’s so important to you that you can literally lose all your time, your peace and your sleep on?
Now, comment below and let me know your thoughts on this article. I would love to know what impact it made on your life.